Hi today is fishy because I have been down to the  quay at North Shields to purchase a large box of fresh haddock. As I have endlessly stated I live on the coast and there is an abundance of fish, crabs, prawns lobster mussels available. Bought directly from the quayside it’s really good value.

Loved some of Mark Rubio jokes about Donald Trump this week. His plane will be known as Hair Force One and he’s guilty of the worst spray tan in America .Who wants to be orange?

There has been a 3 year enquiry re hundreds of deaths at a Staffordshire hospital. it has concluded no one individual is guilty of any misdemeanour. So I can only conclude they were ALL guilty. Of course they weren’t , but it it is fair to say the various managers are guilty because they are paid higher salaries to accept the responsibility of things going wrong. In other words the enquiry was a waste of time! What a surprise and what do the relatives of those who died unnecessarily think?

Apparently the surname Cameron means “crooked mouth”. I rest my case.

The patron saint of England St. George is also the patron saint of leprosy and syphilis. . Thank God I was born in Scotland.

The largest bra size is 48V. That seems quite big to me but possibly because I didn’t realise whales have breasts!!!

Kristin Scott Thomas, the actress said last week she was ashamed of the modern British woman. Who wear fake tan , normally Trump orange, short skirts and low cut tops and fall down drunk even when temperatures are below zero. She must have been to the Bigg Market in Newcastle cos thats what they look like all of the time!

Tragedy of the week. 88year old Olive Stephens was knocked down and killed by her own car when a bin-man tried to help her by moving her car past his bin lorry in a country lane.

Humour – the annual awards ceremony of the UK porn industry is called the SHAFTAs.

Rats get more depressed in summer than in winter.

In 1986 Michael Foot , the Labour opposition leader at the time was appointed as chairman of a disarmament committee The Times had a headline of :- “Foot Heads Arms Body”

When Canada’s Northern Territories were divided in two in 1999 , people voted to keep the old name. The runner up was “Bob”

There are rumours of even greater cuts in the the next budget. No surprise there. The M.P.s are raising their own salaries this year . And no surprise there either. Greedy bastards.

Woman who avoid the sun or wore sunscreen can look 20 years younger than those who are sun worshippers. Or you could move to the North -East of England where the sun doesn’t shine too often!

Good news Oscar Pistorius wasn’t allowed to appeal against his 15 year sentence fo murdering his girl friend.

Jerry Hall and Rupert Murdoch, 84 got married today . Hope they have a long and fruitful marriage and are blessed with lots of kids. Sorry you can’t have kids in your 60’s can you. Forgot.

Poem this week is attached.                                                EQUALITY



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