FRIVOLOUS FRIDAY

Frivolous for no special reason. Just quite like the word.

My daughter has just had an enormous tattoo on her leg of a owl. I quite like it but it is a bit showy for me. I am thinking about a small one on my shoulder , maybe a thistle (for my Scottish ancestry) a horse (because I like them) or perhaps a eagle. As one of my friends said are you not too old for that sort of thing that IS the very reason to do it . Because it isn’t sensible. So watch this space.

The student fee system for uni’s in this country (England) is a joke. It costs £9,000 per annum but already some uni’s are being allowed to put it up to £9250, which will soon become the norm. 75% of todays students will be paying the debt off in their 50,s with a average debt of £44,000. As you do not have to pay anything back until you earn £21,000 it is likely 50% will NEVER be paid back. Also European students owe £1.3 billion now and it is growing ever year. At present if they,ve left the UK. there is no way to enforce the debt. By the time you take all the admin associated with implementation is is probably cheaper to not charge them at all which is what happens in Scotland now. Madness.

So the Heavyweight championship of the US is finally decided Trump v Clinton. , although there seemed to be a huge number of dissenting voices at both conferences. For the sake of the World lets hope Hillary wins. Putin wants Trump to win which is a good enough reason to support Clinton.

120 pilot whales were killed in the Faroe Isles recently by driving them into a narrow bay and bludgeoning them to death. Apparently it is a yearly tradition. Last year they killed 838 whales in total. It may be traditional but it is still barbaric and wrong. I put it in the same category as bullfighting. It is not even a straight fight between bull and man. The bull is maimed before it enters the ring. Why don’t they do the same to the man, tie his hands behind his back perhaps.

Humour. Sweden makes biofuel from dead rabbits.

The Greek god Atlas had an aunt called Doris. Of course he did!

The current pope Francis I used to work as a bouncer in a Buenos Aires nightclub. A handy guy to have next to you in a fight then. But do you bless or beat them?

Oh, no in 80% of US Presidential elections the taller candidate won!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know I,m old , but who or what is the Pokemon thing. Will it catch on do you think?

Trust the IOC to cop out, leaving the decision whether Russian cheats can participate in various sports or not at Rio. They should have been banned totally.

Two sports awards this week, Chris Froome for winning the Tour de France 3 times without using drugs and to Johanna Konta for winning The Bank of West Tennis Classic in Stanford, USA beating Venus Williams in the final which hardly got a mention in the British papers this week.

Poem Attached       LAST RESORT

 

FLAMING FRIDAY

It is not very often living in the North East of England we can say it is hot. Well this we can. To be fair only for a couple of days. But the rest of the week it has been pleasantly warm. In fact for a labrador called Bruce it has been too hot. He still seems to have a winter coat which I can actually pull out in tufts. They are certainly a cold climate dog and do suffer when it is warm. But of course I live on the coast so he can cool off in the sea every day. They just love water.

I am not going to mention politics this week as frankly I’m just fed up with it. The television and media are in their element and its just on ALL the time. My only thought is that virtually all politicians of all the various parties appear to be only interested in themselves rather than their parties or the country!

This word for Britain leaving the European Union is BREXIT. I hate this word , it means nothing!!!!!!!!

Ok Russia should be banned from participating in the Olympic games in all sports never mind athletics. Their sports ministry actually organised positive drug tests being changed. Also the punishments for being caught should be a lot harsher, a ten year ban or even life. They are CHEATS. Then it would be an example to others.

Turkey has had a failed coupe this week. They keep saying they are democratic. They are not. Just like Russia, China, North Korea and several African countries who don’t allow freedom of speech and civil rights they are dictatorships. As are most of the Arab countries. In fact at the end of the day the majority of people in the world live in dictatorships!!!

I am against nuclear weapons. If any country does use them I don’t believe just the country being attacked will suffer. I think the rest of the world will suffer.

A recent survey claims men spend more time than women on the phone. That doesnt surprise me , men also gossip more and a lot of the time talk a load of shit. Sorry fellows.

Humour . The labourers who built the Great Wall of China were fed on sauerkraut. What no rice?

Hamsters can only blink with one eye at a time!

Eating dogs is legal in 44 US states

The human brain has enough memory to hold three million hours of television. What a frightening thought!!!

50 Shades of Grey has now earned £52million for author EL James after the film rights were sold. If only she could write properly!

Christina Estrada, The super model has been awarded the following in her divorce settlement. £60million for a small house in London, then per annum, £600k for private jets, £21k for shoes, £83k for dresses, £15k for three suitcases, 34k for sun glasses, £59k for handbags and £93k for facials. She has £20 million of her own money by the way. Who says there is one law for the rich etc.

Finally , talking about the rich it has been announced the Queen is taking in lodgers. Not just any lodgers of course. It will cost you £20k a month for a 4 bed apartment at St. James palace if you fancy it.

Poem attached as usual  MEMORY OF DAYS GONE BY

FANFARE FRIDAY

I doubt if anyone missed me but I was away last Friday on holiday. I was walking from Ilkley in Yorkshire to Bowness-on Windemere in the Lake District a distance of 82 miles. We, me and three other elderly gentlemen took 5 1/2 days an average of 16 miles a day. It was enjoyable but I thought I would feel euphoric when I reached the end but the truth is I was just relieved to finish and go home to my own bed. To also put the feat in context we had our luggage transported by an appropriately named company, Sherpa. We also stayed in pubs and bed and breakfast places. At my age I need a comfortable bed and a shower every night.

A lot has happened since my last blog. The world is now being taken over by women. Theresa May has become PM, Angela Merkel in Germany, hopefully Hilary Clinton in the US. A woman Home Secretary, a woman challenging for leader of the Labour Party and a woman first minister in Scotland. I have no problems with that at all! I am however delighted that the “poor little rich boys” messrs. Cameron and Osborne have gone. The dwarfish Michael Gove ( who because he thinks he’s clever everybody should think so.) He did get top marks for treachery however. Nicky Morgan has gone only because she was useless and Stephen Crabb for being caught sending sex texts (or to put it another way he said it was to spend more time with his family!)

Unfortunately Jeremy Hunt remains and the humourless Hammond has been promoted. Boris Johnson is now foreign secretary but at least the rest of the world thinks he is nearly as funny as Donald Trump.

The Labour Party? Well I am a supporter, but they are trying to destroy the party between themselves. Jeremy Corbyn, is principled, intelligent and supposedly a nice man but he is totally useless as a leader. But the other two running as new leader don’t inspire. They appear to be running on the “we are not as bad as Jeremy Corbyn” ticket. I’m waiting for a messiah to emerge but I may have a long wait.

Lets have some humour. 11,000 keys are lost on the London Tubes and buses every year and I have to confess some are mine!

Picasso painted using ordinary house paint but I want to know what he painted his house with?

There are 8 million Jehovah’s Witnesses on Earth but according to their teachings only 144,000 will be saved at the end of the world. Presumably the rest will be killed in the rush for the exits!

The seven dwarfs are Dopey, Sneezy, Bashful, Grumpy, Sleepy, Happy and Doc. Those names rejected were Baldy, Deafy, Burpy, Tubby, Shorty, Wheezy, Lazy, Jumpy, Dizzy, Nifty and Puffy. I wonder how would be allowed in these days of political correctness?

Fraid todays poem is dark                    RELEASE

 

EVEN MORE FRIGHTENING FRIDAY

This week has probably been one of the most momentous weeks in my life time.

We are out of Europe , or in the process of leaving which is likely to be protracted and very costly to this country. Our PM has gone, I have no doubts he will be able to get a job as a used car salesman which is more suited to his abilities. The rats have started to fight already as to who will take over. The following are the runners and riders!

Theresa May, A plastic Margaret Thatcher, a sheep in wolves clothing. Could never be accused of having a sense of humour. Wears nice shoes (apparently)

Michael Gove, The poissoned (his father was a fish monger) dwarf who thinks he is the brightest match in the matchbox who stabs his friends in the back and who said on many occasions he didn’t want to be PM.A cross between Brutus and Judas Iscariot !.

Stephen Crabb Running on the ticket that he didn’t go to Eton ans was brought up by a single mother on a council estate. Has been a minister for all of a year!

Liam Fox Has aspirations to be the most loathsome Scot. in history. Should have stayed a medical doctor. Would have been more use.

Andrea Leadsom. Who? Was a high flying banker so we know what she’s like!

Non runners Nicky U-turn Morgan who is just looking for any top job. Jeremy Hunt who thinks he can be successful at some role eventually.

Winner Theresa May. If you want to vote pay £25 to join the Conservative Party and get the same vote as an MP.

LABOUR No leadership vacancy yet but watch this space. 172 MPs have given him a vote of no confidence. No noticeable signs of a future PM. Even cheaper to join the Labour Party, £3 and same voting rights as an MP.

In fact pay £28 and decide the future of the country, cheap at the price.

Another disaster , England got knocked out of the European football championship by the mighty Iceland (population 300,000) and the manager resigned! No obvious candidates for this either, Arsene Wenger or Steve Bruce perhaps.

Ryan Giggs, the ex Man Utd player and assistant manager is going to leave the club because they didn’t make him manager. Good riddance you little shit. Thinks he is Gods gift to women. At last his wife has kicked him out after numerous affairs including with his own brothers wife. Disgusting individual!

After England’s defeat Bobby Charlton , one of the stars who won the world cup in 1966 was asked if his team would have beaten Iceland. He said yes by 1-0. Only 1-0 yes he said we are in our 70’s now!!!!!

Why are womens buttons on the left and mens on the right? Why not the same way?

For some reason Tuesday nights sleep is the best of the week. We get 1/2hr more on Friday and Saturday nights but Tuesday is of better quality. Also women sleep more than men by all of 17 minutes.

Humour It takes 5 people to extract semen from a vulture.

At 21 Mussolini was homeless and living under a bridge in Switzerland. Obviously good training in becoming a dictator!

Martian sunsets are blue.

the first choice of a name for Disneys Hannah Montana was Alexis Texas but it was already taken by a porn star!

Poem attached.    THE HOUSE