To people who are retired Monday is a good day! No particular Monday morning feeling as you dont go to work. It is easier to go shopping and the roads and buses and local trains are quieter as long as you avoid rush hour. But the biggest pleasure for me is walking my dog on a quiet beach. Everyone who has a dog seems they need to walk it on the beach at a weekend. I dont people blame for it, they cant always do it during the week, but it is just lovely having a large beach to ones self.

Anyway the reason for my blog being on a Monday is that I have been on holiday. I went to Lisbon and Porto in Portugal and the mighty Madrid in Spain. Lisbon is a very pleasant city but Porto, which is a lot smaller, is just simply stunning. I really recommend a visit. And Madrid is full of beautiful buildings and art galleries. Two of the bigger galleries I visited, the Del Prado and the Thyssen-Bornemizsa are huge and it would take days to see all the exhibits! It is apparent Madrid was hugely wealthly in the past if not so much now. Three great cities.

I have just looked through the Sunday papers and there is no mention of Syria and Aleppo in particular. Obviously the world has given up and Assad supported by Russia has now almost regained control. And where was the UN. Oh, well, they are still talking!  Yet again Putin just does what he likes. And it may well be that Trump will allow him to do more of what he likes in the future. It is always said that the President of the USA is the most powerful man in the world but is that true any more?

Fidel Castro died over the weekend. Apparently he had 20 luxury homes, a private island, a 88 ft yacht and a large number of mistresses, whilst most Cubans lived in poverty. Communism at its best!!!!!!

HUMOUR Scatomancy is telling the future by looking at turds!

Prisoners on Alcatraz always had hot showers so they didnt get acclimatised to cod water and try to escape by swimming.

Human rights were invented in Iran but us British invented the concentration camp!

It has been a bad week for the royal family. Firstly a traffic warden gave parking tickets to two vehicles unloading Xmas tree decorations  for the Queen at Windsor Castle. And Prince Harrys Navy ship wouldnt start. Luckily Harry was in the Carribean and so just went off to a nearby island for a picnic.

Poem attached


Fossil Friday not because I’m old but because I’m in an organisation called U3A which is an abbreviation for University of the third age. It’s basically an organisation which promotes education for elderly people. Old people obviously cant do the same physical things as when you are young(I still try) but a lot of us still want to learn new subjects. The beauty is when you retire you have more time and your kids have left home. Ok, a lot of us have grand children duties but we have more free time to do things we couldn’t when we worked. In my case I have studied ecology, local history, archaeology, natural history and most of all creative writing. I had never written anything after leaving school apart from business letters and reports. Certainly nothing creative. But know I write this blog every week, a poem and at least one short story. To be honest I don’t know if I am any good but I have just been short listed for one of my stories in my local area North Tyneside. The important thing is I love writing!!!!

After all that the reason for Fossil Friday is I’m leading a archaeology group. You who are young dont be frightened of old age there are still lots of exciting  opportunies to achieve things. Actually I’m off to Lisbon and Porto in Portugal and Madrid  in Spain tomorrow on my own and I’m going to Vietnam in January. There’s life in the old dog yet.

The police in the UK have just admitted its now treating insults against people with ginger hair as hate crime. What a joke!

Two years ago a British citizen was kidnapped and removed to Ethiopa. He has spoken out against that countries terrible human rights record. Nobody from this country has demanded his release. He had lived in the UK for 37 years since his younger brrther was murdered by the regime. Our government has doing to help. Shame on you!!

HUMOUR            Alternative names considered for Twitter were Friendstalker and Throbber. Wouldn’t Throbber have been great!

Not funny but amazing, Mississippi did not prohibit slavery until 1995.

The company Apple Inc. is worth more than Sweden, Poland or Nigeria.

The founders of Hewlett-Packard, presumably Mr Hewlett and Mr Packard flipped a coin to decide which name would come first in the company name.

So Mr Putin has decided to bomb Aleppo, Syria from his aircraft carrier now. And who’s going to stop him bombing the 250,000 left in the East of the city out of existence. Nobody is the answer because the whole world is frightened of him. Cowards!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally a British woman who claims she was raped in Dubai was put in prison for having extra-marital sex. The two men, also British have not been arrested so far. The foreign office “are aware of the situation” but have done nothing. What sort of country has laws like that. Oh, I forgot, they,ve got lots of oil. So what do we do , turn a blind eye!

Poem attached                        a-premonition





Well I suspect most of us were wrong. The Trumpmeister won. So there are I suspect lots of winners and losers.

On the happy side are USA gun owners, men who have lost manufacturing jobs, racists, sexists, bankers, protectionists and right wing extremists, Russians inc Putin. probably NATO, anti abortionists


Losers are women, Hispanics especially Mexicans, Muslims, Chinese exporters, possibly gays, health care reformists, immigrants , supporters of climate change.

He is supported by a majority in the Senate and the House of Representatives so will find getting legislation through much much easier than Obama.

However he cannot pay for everything he said he was going to do so will have to water a lot of things down. We will have to wait and see what he does in the future. He is a pretty horrible individual but what it all depends what ACTIONS he takes in the future. The major problem is that he is probably now the most powerful man in the world and if he is as protectionist for the USA as he claims there could be worldwide repercussions. Putin may be allowed to do what he likes. He already totally ignores the rest of the world in Syria but he may become even more aggressive in the Baltic states and Ukraine.

There is however a message that comes across from this election which has followed on from our own “Brexit” vote. The ordinary man in the street does not trust mainline polictians of the old established parties. There now exists an anti establishment lobby which is likely to grow substantially.

Humour  When the infant Mozart first rose to prominence people thought he was a dwarf in disguise. As a child he was terrified of trumpets

Bananas have more trade regulations than the AK-47 gun and I,m willing to bet they haven’t killed as many people!!!!

A woman who is bitten by a cat has a 50% chance of being diagnosed with depression.

Ps If you are bitten by a red squirrel it can give you leprosy.

Colonel Sanders’s career as a lawyer came to an end when he assaulted his own client in court. Good job he had Kentucky Fried Chicken to fall back on!!!!

Congrats Andy Murray. World no.1 in tennis, but depending on the end of season tournament starting tomorrow he may lose it again. Enjoy while yo can.

Can you F**king believe it. Experts say women now swear more than men. Women now say f*** 546 times per million words compared to men at 540 per million. But who the F*** counted them?

A lady this week was fined £25 for littering when she threw a chip to a pigeon. I’m surprised the pigeon didn’t eat the evidence!

I wonder if Mike from “Suits” knows his wife Rachel is seeing our Prince Harry. He should,  our papers are absolutely full of it.

Poem this week attached    ghosts



Last week was Halloween and tomorrow is Bonfire night. I know people will disagee with me but I think they are both pretty pointless experiences. Ok young children who like dressing up will enjoy the party experience but nowadays we have hoards of teenagers in large gangs roaming the streets knocking on doors in the dark. They are actually quite threatening. And do older kids really want a handful of sweets anyway.

Also the idea of a firework display is again  old hat except for younger kids who havent seen one before. They are all organised at large venues for health and safety reasons. When I was a kid every family bought a box of fireworks and set them off in their own back yard, we had a bonfire on the corner of every street. It did seem fun then but now it is totally controlled. Shame really.

Well the fireworks are going to be in the US. The fight for the Heavyweight championship of the world. Or Trump v Clinton. If there is any sanity left in the world surely Hillary will win. But even if she does Trump is going to claim she cheated and the ballot was rigged. I can’t see him going away easily. I can’t believe women would want to vote for him. Sensible men are disgusted by him. I know Hillary has faults but I think she would make a better leader than him. I know it is actually a case of the least worst option but I’m afraid that is what politics has become. It is exactly the same in the UK.

People are sick and tired of being miss-lead or lied to , politicians at all levels who never answer questions they are asked and who generally are driven by self interest rather than the good of the country.

The Queen is still riding a horse at 90! Fantastic.

Have just read a headline that stated “KILLER WORM” I then read that “Obama” worms originally from Brazil are killing our earth worms (not humans) They must be good swimmers to get here from Brazil. Also we have been invaded by Asian ladybirds which are killing our native lady birds. This of course follows on from the Spanish giant slugs and Chinese hornets. It will be foreign people next!!!!!

HUMOUR Did you know dildos are illegal in Texas, snake charming is illegal in India and snakes of any kind are illegal in New Zealand. I wonder if there is any connection?

in 1849 The Viceroy of Egypt gave London Zoo a hippotamus in exchange for a greyhound, Wonder what I would have got for my labrador?

Plants suffer from sexually transmitted diseases. Will humans get them by eating the plants. That would be a good excuse wouldn’t it!

An OAP drove 30 miles the wrong way down a motorway before eventually crashing and killing someone. The police warned the public by telling them he was driving south on the northbound carriageway. Except he was driving north on the southbound. Pretty tragic error!

Finally two things caught my eye.

Firstly you shouldnt wear denim if you are over 53. What a joke. I wear denims every day and will continue to do so!!!!

And lastly sex for older womem is much more enjoyable. Apparently becuase their partners have more time, wisdom,sense of humour and men tend to use their brains a bit more than their genitals. Oh, and kids dont burst in when you are older. All these characteristics fit me so anybody interested should apply within. Thank you.

Poem attached          new-day