FRIDAY THE FOURTH

Last week was Halloween and tomorrow is Bonfire night. I know people will disagee with me but I think they are both pretty pointless experiences. Ok young children who like dressing up will enjoy the party experience but nowadays we have hoards of teenagers in large gangs roaming the streets knocking on doors in the dark. They are actually quite threatening. And do older kids really want a handful of sweets anyway.

Also the idea of a firework display is again  old hat except for younger kids who havent seen one before. They are all organised at large venues for health and safety reasons. When I was a kid every family bought a box of fireworks and set them off in their own back yard, we had a bonfire on the corner of every street. It did seem fun then but now it is totally controlled. Shame really.

Well the fireworks are going to be in the US. The fight for the Heavyweight championship of the world. Or Trump v Clinton. If there is any sanity left in the world surely Hillary will win. But even if she does Trump is going to claim she cheated and the ballot was rigged. I can’t see him going away easily. I can’t believe women would want to vote for him. Sensible men are disgusted by him. I know Hillary has faults but I think she would make a better leader than him. I know it is actually a case of the least worst option but I’m afraid that is what politics has become. It is exactly the same in the UK.

People are sick and tired of being miss-lead or lied to , politicians at all levels who never answer questions they are asked and who generally are driven by self interest rather than the good of the country.

The Queen is still riding a horse at 90! Fantastic.

Have just read a headline that stated “KILLER WORM” I then read that “Obama” worms originally from Brazil are killing our earth worms (not humans) They must be good swimmers to get here from Brazil. Also we have been invaded by Asian ladybirds which are killing our native lady birds. This of course follows on from the Spanish giant slugs and Chinese hornets. It will be foreign people next!!!!!

HUMOUR Did you know dildos are illegal in Texas, snake charming is illegal in India and snakes of any kind are illegal in New Zealand. I wonder if there is any connection?

in 1849 The Viceroy of Egypt gave London Zoo a hippotamus in exchange for a greyhound, Wonder what I would have got for my labrador?

Plants suffer from sexually transmitted diseases. Will humans get them by eating the plants. That would be a good excuse wouldn’t it!

An OAP drove 30 miles the wrong way down a motorway before eventually crashing and killing someone. The police warned the public by telling them he was driving south on the northbound carriageway. Except he was driving north on the southbound. Pretty tragic error!

Finally two things caught my eye.

Firstly you shouldnt wear denim if you are over 53. What a joke. I wear denims every day and will continue to do so!!!!

And lastly sex for older womem is much more enjoyable. Apparently becuase their partners have more time, wisdom,sense of humour and men tend to use their brains a bit more than their genitals. Oh, and kids dont burst in when you are older. All these characteristics fit me so anybody interested should apply within. Thank you.

Poem attached          new-day

 

 

 

 

 

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