FINALITY FRIDAY

I attended a funeral recently of a 90 year neighbour who fell down stairs and broke his neck and other bones. He was a catholic and there was a service at his church then I attended his cremation. There was 15 people in attendance. Five relatives including his wife and the rest were friends and neighbours. He was a nice old man . Until recently he would walk to our local newsagents every morning and my dog Bruce and I would walk back to our street together. Bruce liked him because he and his wife always gave him treats. Now this man  originally came from Glasgow and he and his wife didn’t have any kids. Obviously a lot of his friends would have been a similar age to him and were probably dead. but I just thought it was so sad that  so few people were at the funeral of a pleasant and kind old gentleman. It made me think of the utter finality of death.

Laura Trott now Kenny received an award this week at Buckingham Palace. For services to the sport of cycling, her new husband receiving the same award. She said “all I do is ride a bike”. This girl has won 3 gold Olympic medals, several world championship medals and European golds. Her husband has 5 Olympic golds so far. This couple are just true sports and actually ride bikes quite well!

The typical Briton apparently is happy only eight times a week!

Humour Misspell is one of the most commonly misspelled words in the  English language!!!

In the Georgian language mama means “father” and deda means “mother”

The Inuit word “iktsuarpok” means ‘to keep going outside to see if anyone’s coming’

Last week a man made a 4 minute film of himself hanging his baby daughter. He posted it on Facebook and it took them 24 hours before they removed it. What sort of organisation is that?

Dame Vanessa Redgrave the 80 year actress is a former leader of the Trotskyist Workers Revolutionary Party and is an ardent supporter of the current Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn. She flaunted her £31k diamond and gold watch in a recent magazine interview. She can obviously afford to be extreme left wing!!!

Boris Johnson the Conservative clown Foreign Minister can not even persuade his own sister Rachel to vote Conserative. She is hoping to stand as a Lib- dem candidate in the future.

Arkansas has managed to execute two of the eight men on death row before their supplies of lethal injection drug passes its sell by date. When it runs out in a weeks time they cannot replace it and may not be able to execute the other six. This is peoples lives we are talking about not sick animals. absolutely inhumane!

Poem attached                                                       THE END

 

FORENSICALLY FRIDAY

Well, yet another election in the Uk. We have a local one next week to vote for a mayor. Then the biggy in June for who rules the country apart from the Queen that is. Firstly our local mayor , whose function I queried in the local paper last week. Apparently she (currently) runs everything. She is a bit like the President Of the US. She decides who is on the various committees of the local council. She seems to have the final say in all decisions. The mayor has taken over the various roles a leader of the council used to. Except there is a good salary , expenses,  a deputy and the council have just bought a new Jaguar for her to attend the various irrevalent  photo opportunities she attends. In other words another unecessary expensive tier of administation! So I don’t agree with the role but I think everyone should vote  so  I will vote for ALL candidates. In other words my voting paper will be spoilt which is my democratic right.

A drunk man drove at 70 mph in a 30 mph zone. But he wont lose his license  because he runs a company employing 6 men who would lose their jobs if he went to prison. What a joke!

Geoge Osborne our ex Chancellor of Exchequer will stand down as MP for Tatton at the next election. What a surprise, but it it is the least well paid of his several jobs. These people claim they become MP’s , not for the money but because they feel they can make a difference to peoples lives. What hypocrites they are!

Humour— Palm trees are a type of grass. Wouldnt like to mow that lawn!!!

Apparently fruit flies take their time over difficult decisions. BUt what the hell is a difficult decision for a fruit fly?

St. George is the patron saint of England, leprosy and syphilis. ??????

The Romans used powdered mouse brains as toothpaste.

Erdogan , the President of Turkey won the referendum to give him greater powers. He may have “fiddled” the results but as we know dictators are allowed to to do that.

Theresa May is hoping to follow his lead (without cheating) now that she has a 21% lead over Labour. Of course she states that lead is irrelevant even though she previously said she wasnt going to have an election. David Cameron had brought in a law for a  fixed term election every 5 years but she is changing that law. Whats the point of making laws if they can be changed when its expedient?

She has seized this opportunity to eliminate all the opposition, the Labour Party, House of Lords and people in her own party. All so she can do what she likes in the Brexit negotitions. Total self interest! Back to the days of Margaret Thatchers.  If you disagree  “off  with your head”

Im a life long Labour supporter but the Labour party cant win an election under Jeremy Corbyn.  He doesnt seem to get that the Conservatives have a hard core of supporters as have Labour but elections are won by convincing the voters in the middle. Left wing policies will not win the day. So we are likely to be doomed to 5 years, (until 2022) of the plastic Margaret Thatcher. Its a horrorifying prospect.

I can see the LIb Dems doing reasonably well with  their remain in the single European market policy. Dont forget 48% voted to remain!

In the last few years we have £4 million in foreign aid to North Korea. Whats that about?

Poem attached          IF

.

FASTIDIOUSLY FRIDAY

It’s Good Friday today and something like half the population of the UK eat fish today. I know its for a religious reason but I suspect most people like me cant remember why. Fish and chips make a fortune today.

The reason I  named my blog “beach thoughts” was that I walk my dog on the beach most days and it allows me to think. I also walk him in fields evening and night. About 2 and a half hours in total. It is obviously good for him but it is also hugely beneficial to me to. I got my dog when i retired from work and as I always liked walking thought it logical I might as well have a dog to walk with me. I have in previous blogs extolled the virtues in having a dog this time I,m praising the benefits of my walking. Walking is better than riding a bike , driving a car (I drove between 45-50 thousand miles a year before I retired), being on a boat,  or flying. The only thing that is similarly relaxing is a train journey. The beauty of walking is that on the beach for example every day is different. rocks are in different positions, the sand moves around and even if you walk at the same time everyday because the tide comes in at different times i don’t know what I’m going to see each day. You spot shells, unusual stones, debris from the sea . You need to look down or you will miss something interesting. Also the sea birds change from season to season. When I walk in the fields seasons again change the trees, flowers even the grasses and the crops in the fields. Also the weather is different every day. That is what I see. But while doing this I think about things. if I have problems I can generally come up with an answer as I’m not being interrupted in my thoughts. I also come up with ideas for short stories and poems. Obviously my dog wants his ball thrown or I meet people and chat but most of the time I’m alone with my thoughts. Ok, you probably found this boring and I probably come across as a loner. Well that is not me at all! I love people  and i’m in loads of clubs, watch sport and talk a lot!

Enough HUMOUR. Apparently the facial expressions on lego characters have become increasingly angry over the last 30 years!

People are more likely to co-operate with you if you give them something warm to hold!!!!!

33% of the bread produced in the uk is wasted, compared with 6% wine. No surprise there then!

I have just discovered after 64 years of doing it I have discovered I have been tying my laces wrongly. Mechanical engineers from the University of Berkeley have come up with the best way and it is totally different to mine. Well I’m certainly not changing now!

539 town hall bosses are paid more than the Prime Minister. Local authorities are all cutting services but the bosses have received 11% more in salaries and expenses. And they tell us we have a funding crisis.

Poem attached          FUN AT THE FAIR

 

FIXATION FOR FRIDAYS

This week has been a beautiful week, cold at night but sunny during the day. No rain whatsoever which is unusual for England in April. As I walked the beach one day this week I thought (hence beach thoughts) those of you who have dogs will understand, it was a day we deserve.

We walk in all weathers and most dogs are not interested whether we have snow wind rain. They just want to be out. We wear the appropriate clothes but some days it is a chore to be out in torrential rain, a snowstorm or a bitter wind (in my case straight from the Arctic. So during the nice days it becomes a pleasure. We deserve the good days because we have earned them. It is just wonderful to walk on a sunny day on an empty beach, but I might be strange but there is also a great satisfaction on arriving home on the awful days. We have done our duty to our dog.

I got one of those activity tracking things for Xmas, mine’s a Garmin but there are lots of others on the market. I apparently walk at least 7 miles a day including a mile before breakfast. Thats what a dog does for you. Just read today half of women and a third of British men walk less than half a mile a day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So a Spanish matador got himself gored this week. He’s not dead but just injured especially his pride. Well he should not have tangled with a half maimed angry bull should he? Serves him right. Even thought my favourite author Ernest Hemingway tries to justify bull fighting in his book “Death in the Afternoon” it is just cruel and should be banned.

Apparently there is a cancer risk from a chemical used in potato crisps. You could be in danger if you eat 25 packets every day!

Dog yawns are infectious! Hamsters can only blink eye at a time.

2.8 million American dogs are on antidepressants.

Scotland is (sorry has) the biggest bog in Europe

People who believe in luck are luckier than those who don’t!

So Russia is not immune to terror attacks. Eleven were killed on St. Petersburg Metro this week. Nowhere is safe anymore.

Did you know the British army has more horses than tanks now. And apparently they cost more to maintain. At least it’s reassuring that we are ready for a cavalry attack.

Political correctness gone mad. A 53 year old woman has been awarded £360,000 compensation for one instance of sexual harrassment. Now I’m totally against harrassment of any sort but as she was on £22k a year that is 16 years salary. It’s just too much.

Wallis Simpson who married King Edward Viii causing him him to abdicate from the throne was having an affair with a used car salesman. Disgraceful.

Finally a woman in Scotland has to pay £24,500 parking fees. Apparently it’s a record.

Poem Attached         NOT SO SIMPLE