FORTISSIMO FOR FRIDAY

Another week has gone. We have just over two weeks left for our self isolation in the UK. It looks as if things will be eased off then probably slowly at first. We are expecting some of the schools going back in May, shops and some factories will open.I saw a Oxford professor on the TV tentatively forecasting we may have a vaccine available in Sept/Oct. Ready for millions of the population with some priorities at first. Hopeful news soon.

Deaths and infections are slowly coming down which is also good. Although deaths in care homes are also increasing.

Bear with me I won’t be much longer with the corona news. With out the inevitable inquests into how the government performed during this crisis the facts are likely to emerge that the provision of  safety equipment (SSE) for the NHS and latterly care homes has been far too slow. Also the testing has just this week been improved substantially, but again far too slowly. Finally it is likely that the number of deaths in the UK will be greater than any other country in Europe pro rata to population. I hope civil servants and scientists will not be made scrapecoats rather than the politicians who hopefully deserve a larger part of the culpability.

Sorry that was my rant over.

When I wrote my blog some 4 or 5 years ago it was based on my thoughts while walking my dog Bruce on the beach where I live in Whitley Bay , a seaside town in the North east of England. I have recently moved house which is now closer to the beach in Cullercoats. We live about 10 miles from Newcastle but the Northumberland coast has 60 miles of magnificent sandy beaches. We are the most northerly county in England and the least populated.. We have more castles than any other county and Northumbria was both a centre of Christianty and military might in the 9th century. The coast line was invaded by the Vikings but never occupied . They settled futher south in Yorkshire but were kept at bay by the fierce nature of the local inhabitants.Many battles were fought by the Scots and English in Northumberland which was why we have so many castles. In the southern border of the county is Hadrians wall which some 2000 years ago seperated the Romans from the Picts and the Scots. This area , mainly Newcastle was where the railways were first invented as was the first electric lights. In fact the oldest dedicated commuter railway line  in the world   between North Shields and Newcastle is only 2 miles from where I live. This area is a hugely  important area in history. I will bore you with other facts from the area in the future.

HUMOUR

Aristotle thought small penises were better because semen got cold in large ones! I couldn’t possibly comment on that!

Ancient Greeks declared their love for a woman by throwing an apple at her.

In the Himalayas the smoke from burning millipedes is used to treat haemorrhoids!

It’s illegal in Saudi Arabia for men to work in lingerie stores!

In 2014 a pair of underpants donated by the Mayor of Brussels was stolen from the Brussels Underpant Museum. Interesting!

There are more plastic flamingoes in the USA than real flamingoes.

OLD FASHIONED WORDS

Shindy–A noisy disturbance, commotion.

Shufty– A peak or look.

Guffaw– Loud laughter.

Larrikin– A rough , disorderly person.

Larrup– To whip or flog.

Floozy– A disreputable or loose woman

GEORDIE WORDS

Bleb– A spot or flaw.

Brekks– Trousers.

Howk– Pull violently

Whisht– To be quiet.

Tatty- Unkempt, untidy.

Thank you and good night My poem is attached       .Revelation 2nd draft

 

 

 

 

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